Knowing People.

Knowing People.

How important is really knowing and understanding people? Getting to know who people really are requires the ability to ask questions and be interesed in their responses in order to create and maintain value added relationships, if that is your aim. Collaboration with other people who accompany us on our daily journey is an art worth developing; otherwise we are simply going it alone because we are ignoring the importance of sharing and caring!

How we relate to others can be vitally important to our wellbeing. In addition, we have the tools for verbal communication, which at times seems to be a dying art, judging by the go-it-alone apps that prevail in our everyday society. Mixing with others is a common daily event for most people as we go about our daily journeys. Even though most of us are blessed with the faculty of speech, it doesn’t necessarily follow that we are good communicators. Speaking is a faculty, yet communication is an art, as I’m constantly reminding people. God gave us one

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mouth and two ears, and we would benefit and be better served by using them in that proportion.

The main key is listening! Only by finding out about another human being can we begin to understand them. Thi

s can be achieved by asking questions as opposed to making statements. In addition, given that questions are being asked, the replies need to be heard and understood.

Having said all that, how does one intentionally set about winning people to their cause? The means required in order to truly achieve two-way communication are first to get off self and focus on the other person, then listen with true intent to understand by showing interest and finally agreeing with what the discussion is about.

In order to truly get off self and be with another person, then focusing on them is important, followed by listening with a true intent to understand what they have to say and showing genuine interest so that comment on the dialogue is honest and clearly thought about!

In order to truly focus you need to look at the person. Direction alone is not sufficient: it needs to be eye contact. Not a glare, nor a stare but genuine eye to eye contact accompanied by a smile. Having done that, having asked your question, shut up and listen!

Listening with a view to understand is far removed from waiting for a break in the conversation and diving in with the sound of your own voice! If not truly wanting to find out about another person, don’t ask questions! The next important step is to acknowledge what is being said by nodding and showing full attention. Whether you agree with what is being said is not the issue yet giving people the right to express a point of view is. Respect that and stand a chance of being listened to in return. Disrespect that and risk an argument, which, incidentally, nobody wins.

Lovely sharing with you and I look forward to your response,

Warm regards, John Mulvey 0411 541 899

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